Back to blogs 4, November 2018.

Your Life Is Happening From You.


Having studied phenomenology and some psychological theorists and practitioners over the past 10 year or more. Some of them have very controversial ideas about consciousness. I base my understanding on my own experience primarily and the intellectual literature is secondary. What I want to point out is...We are not floating around in a world that is random and chaotic, though at times it might appear and seem that way. All your experiences are real including your delusions, dreams, and fantasies. Life can feel surreal at times especially when you are challenged talking to a person who has ideas which stretch your own thinking.

  Questions arise… How do we have direct and honest communication between two people?

How do we create the conditions where this actually happens?

How do you use words?

  Honest integration of information matters, every time you do something you know isn’t right you will get walloped for it one way or another.

  Dealing with consequences that unsettle you is coming from you and people do suffer from that experience. This dichotomy is what we seem to be dealing with in the world today in the unequal and incongruent experiences of individual people. Sometimes the best that you have got is not an optimal solution for another person. Actual problems do exist it is import to be totally present at all times. Do people use their full potential? You bring to yourself and others unnecessary suffering as a result of your own pathological ideology.

  Evil is the absence of good it does exist. Being fully present fully in your body and fully integrated as a human being is paramount to avoiding evil from manifesting in your own life. I would go as far as to say in yourself. When we are suffering it is a vital principal to know it is coming from you not your partner. It is you who is suffering therefor it is you who needs to deal with this.

  Even in psychological professional realms this goes awry. The unhappiness of your partner will affect you. Couples have to have conflict, however conflict doesn’t have to undo you as a couple. It can be there and you can take responsibility for yourself in the process. Be fully in the process in order to find out for yourself what is not aligned inside of you. One pathway or choice to correcting yourself is dialogue and body movement.

  You are the locus of experience. What you focus on grows. Science has supported these concepts especially recently with the discovery of bioenergetics and quantum physics. If you are struggling with life and what is happening know this, it is happening for you, not to you. If you change your mindset and adopt this bias you will find your situation changing in favor of your greatest potential and good at that point in time. You will have a discussion that will go somewhere. Your goal in relationship is not to maintain unbounded peace. Your goal is to move out of roles and reclaim your own individual power. Be awake. This strategy gives you the capacity to understand the other persons thoughts and feelings. Try it and get back to me, your feedback is welcome.

© 2019 Nicole Esplin.

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